It’s been a tough few months. I’m not a fan of the whole “woe is me” attitude — particularly when I have been blessed beyond belief across so many areas of my life. But if I’m being honest, it’s been difficult to shake the feelings of doom and gloom when an invisible force has ravaged the world, just when we were to be celebrating our marriage.
I’ve struggled with the tension between grief and gratitude during this time. Justified as it may be, it feels petty to be grieving the loss of a traditional wedding day, considering all the tragedy the world has recently faced. I don’t think there’s an easy fix for this tension. But for now, I’m choosing to reflect on gratitude.
My community has cultivated a sense of togetherness I never thought possible during a time of physical distance. Kyle and I have received so much love, countless well wishes and kind gestures. A thoughtful group of colleagues sent a Grubhub gift card so we could still celebrate the typical pre-wedding festivities over tasty food of our choosing. On the original bridal shower date, my sister compiled a series of heartwarming videos from family and friends, along with a cookbook full of their favorite dessert recipes. My mom hand sewed bedazzled masks in our wedding colors.
And most recently, in the lead-up to a virtual bachelorette party, my incredible friends surprised me with care packages chock-full of my favorite cozy things (a beautiful plant, fancy cheeses, wine from Napa, colorful flowers, chocolate-covered strawberries, Insomnia cookies, endless Trader Joe’s snacks, and, last but not least, a Bark Box for my dog, Tiger). They made sure I was still able to celebrate — glitter pajama style — even if physically apart.
It’s been a tough few months. But it’s been made so much easier knowing we’re surrounded by the kindest, most generous and thoughtful friends and family imaginable. I’ll continue to count my blessings. And in a few weeks, although it might not look like what we had envisioned, I’ll still get to marry my best friend. And at the end of the day, that’s really what matters.